My one attempt at €ulture through 4 years of €ollege was a film €ourse who's only relevance to me at present is that I am unable to enjoy every movie I go to see... I've always taken pride in this (believed) holier-than-thou perspective on the movie busine$$... lately, however, I've realized the actual reason I hate every movie in the past 5 years is simply because they really are that bad... I'm not a special butterfly of film criticism... I'm a carbon cutout regular Joe movie-goer... In some twisted producer's mind 'special effects' are seen as the rock to the 'any semblance of a decent plot or storyline's' scissors... and the trifecta paper of this pitiful combination should be 'theater goers with a semblance of self-respect willing to stay home and put up with a made for TV Kirk Cameron movie rather than choke on the next dull-as-bone tossed at their feet by the studios'... This has not happened yet...
... The last 5 movies I've seen...
... As a comedy Stop Brothers is supposed to be stupid and can thus get away with anything...
... In Transformers they tried to airlift the Cube out on a chopper forgetting that 3 of the bad guys could fly and none of the good ones could...
... In Pride and Glory a handshake is supposed to make corruption, a day of riots, and a cop-killing go away forever for everyone...
...The glory of The Lord of the Rings books was the story was only a small part of a much larger war going on all over the continent. Yet in the movie they had to have everything on the screen with nothing else going on outside of it. They even showed the Eye of Sauron. Film 101: Some things are better left to the imagination... IE: The books created a much more powerful fear of being watched when you didn't see or know where Sauron was... But most importantly, as pointed out by another, if the eagles are going to come to SAVE Frodo and Sam at the volcano, why couldn't they have just flown and dumped the ring in the lava in the first place?...
... And yesterday... The Matrix: Reloaded... And in it's defense the one thing it does have going for it is it makes you think... With The Question... 'What i$ €ontrol?'... interesting... a little... provocative... slightly... handled many different ways from many different perspectives... (there's something about a euro-centric colonialist snobbish french-accented d-bag to really drive home the point)... a glimmer of hope... but the only interesting part... and beaten to death...
... This movie loses me when the simple obvious solution is somehow overlooked for the sake of footage most likely already shot and too valuable to be scrapped... it's like they plan the movie around a few really good action scenes and then do whatever they can to get from fight 1 to chase 2 to fight 3... It's what happens when you try to magic upon a sequel of a spectacularly good first movie in mere days... see also: Pirates of the Carribean... In this case where it loses me is... if The Matrix has all sorts of glitches that are running wild causing all sorts of damage... well... simple... give all the humans ambien for 10 minutes... reboot the system... and problem solved... I know it works because I do this every day on my laptop on account of I use windows... and if you must keep Zion around... then kill everyone minus 5 males and 18 females... and then go back to business as usual...
...I'm not this sadistic someone cheering for the bad guys in every movie... but if the director is such an idiot as to set the rules of the movie to where the bad guy... acting exactly how they would... should win... then so be it... gone are the days when 50 machine gun weilding bad guys all somehow miss the good-guy running under no cover less than 10 feet away... we learned this in the last awful Rambo movie... gone are the days when the bad guy's nervous breakdown at the most pivitol moment saves the win for the good guy... I don't care how many people liked Reservoir Dogs... and gone are the days when I will trust a teaser trailer to guarantee me a good movie... I'm even wary of the new X-men because the last 2 were so bad.
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