Star Wars

Yesterday the sci fi network was helping George Lucas promote his new movie by playing a IV, V, and VI movie marathon...

... For the record... I'm just a little bit a nerd... secondly... these old Star Wars movies are actually really good... in comparison to the new Star Wars movies which were the second biggest let down of my life... Not simply because of Jar Jar Binks... though he has a lot to do with it... it's mostly a lot of small things all connected together that lift the first ones up and tear the second ones down...

... And it begins with characters...

... The characters are better... In the depth... everyone has something more to offer... something bigger about them... not seen... from their past... in their future... you get a glimpse of it every now and then and that's it... There's no delicacy in the new ones... they're smaller... they're too good... too evil... too holier than thou... too reckless... there's no moving pieces, no internal struggle, nothing you don't already suspect... everything's out there for everyone to see from every character... I guess except one... Anakin does struggle... but poorly... he was so not big enough an actor for his role...

... but I'm not sure if I should blame his awful acting abilities or the...

... Plot...

... In the old There is also something more going on with the plot... something bigger outside of all the characters... something.. again... NOT SEEN... the pieces all move and these characters simply happen to fall into it all and be in the right place at the right time... and it works...

... The new movies are so forced... so forced... we already know how it's going to end... The trick is how it gets there...

... But there is no trick... start to finish is a straight, DEAD, path to the IVth movie... not a twist you don't already see... not an "I wonder what's going to happen next" moment... not an "oh wow I can't believe that just happened" in the theater... It's just one plodding scene on into the next for 6 solid hours...

... and not one writer did anything about it? Not one person looked past the... "oh, this is a surefire 100 schmill in the bank" to the hopeful possibility of putting their stamp on history... a movie that people are going to bring up.. and watch again... and be their bar with future movies...

... fool us... scare us... take me to a place in the movie where there is no possible way it's going to work out the way I know it HAS to work out... and then do something I don't expect with it... something that works... that's totally believable that solves the whole mess and makes it good...

... Maybe make the Anakin/Princess relationship a little bit harder... put a diplomat in the picture that she has to choose between...

... Maybe include a couple more jedis around Anakin's age in training to act as foils for Anakin to deepen the plot... maybe develop some sort of character out of this awful actor despite his awful acting...

... and yes...

... There was almost a twist... almost... when Duku? told Obiwan he was a traitor to the government because he learned that the government was the pawn of the Sith... What a twist... What an actual incredible twist... It could work... Make Duku good... make the Jedi have to pick sides... there's confusion... there's friends fighting friends... there's trust issues... and divided loyalties... and strife... few, if any, really know which side is the right one to begin with... and place 'no actin' Anakin and Princess right in the middle of the whole mess... sit back... and see how the cards turn out...

... I probably... actually... might have liked it then...